Our new battle

I think I am the cause of my latest battle of wills with the kids.  Hannah's first non-breastmilk meal was at 8months old.  After a trip to South Africa when she was around 6months old, we decided to start her with solid food.  But she must have picked up something serious from deepest darkest Africa, because for a week after we got home she threw up everything... wasting away until at her 6month check-up she weighed less than she had at her 3month check-up!!!  It was heartbreaking and scary.  But as strangely as it appeared so it went, and we still aren't sure what the cause was.  But it put back any thoughts of solid food.  I was frightened to make her stomach upset with new foods, so the doctor agreed that we wait a while. 

From meal one I was overly conscientious.  Everything was home-made.  No baby jars for me!!  All freshly made or frozen mini-meals.  So healthy and good for her, and she grew well and smart and strong.  But I continued with those individual mini meals.  Since Glen's work schedule didn't coincide with her dinner time, I'd always feed her first and then cook for me and Glen after she was in bed.  And after Oliver came along we did the same thing partly because of the convenience of it.  They got their separate meals made for them at night before I'd cook for me and Glen.  And while they ate I would continue to bring things to them that I knew they would eat until they were full.

In the last few months life at home has felt a little unsettled.  In an attempt to reinforce Cockcroft Family time, we decided that the kids could wait for dinner until Glen was home and we'd all eat together.  I'd make sure they had had good meals in the day beforehand so that if they didn't want all the food on their plate at dinner I knew at least that they wouldn't be starving.   And if Glen was going to be late they could have a snack first.

"They" say that's the right way to do things, and we thought it was the right time to start.  I like the idea of us all eating one meal together now that the kids aren't babies any more.  It means thinking and preparing one meal,  and that after the kids' bath time and bedtime we have time to do our own thing and don't have to then cook and eat our own meal.  We also hoped that it would be a good reinforcement for good behavior and manners. 

Nope.  Not so far.

The kids have never eaten grown-up food.  My own fault.  I just cooked kid food.  No foods touching or mixed together.  No sauce.  No spices/ herbs.  Healthy.  But not how we eat.  Basically the ingredients to a meal all separate on the plate.  I decided that we needed to eat together and we needed to introduce the kids to grown-up food. 

It started off great.  I cooked extremely simple food for us all.  Encouraged the kids to try something "new", and they loved the excitement of it.  For a week.  But the minute I started to make things more complicated the arguing and whining began.  And I feel terrible.  Because table manners and basic manners mean that whining and pushing away food and scooting out from the table before you're done is not OK.  And yet I kind of understand.  It is all just so different to them.  New food.  More attention placed on the food.  A big deal.  And when they don't want what they have on their plate I am not leaping up to make them something else.  "You get what you get and you don't throw a fit".  But they are throwing fits.  And on more than one night they leave the table hardly eating a thing.  For the first time in their lives.

I have made dinner which used to be this happy carefree time of day into this big family drama.  And I feel like I am a bad mother.  I'll be interested to see how I resolve this.  I'll let you know.  It's only been 2 weeks and it feels like centuries.  I picked this battle but now I'm having second thoughts.  Pray for me...

:-(